|
|
OTL OVERVIEW: Look At The Bright Side
Aug 13, 2007 | 11:05
AM PST If you’ve ever worked in television, you know
there’s no point in expecting something brilliant every time. Most shows fail.
We miss the mark more often than hitting it. Formulas have to be followed,
corners cut, and time is never on our side. My writing mentor, who’s created
half a dozen drama series, has few illusions about the job. She once came to
work in a T-shirt that read: THEATRE
IS LIFE
FILM IS ART TV IS
FURNITURE So as On The Lot prepares to join such other
creative misfires as Hee Haw Honeys (Syndication, 1978–1979), My Mother The Car
(NBC, 1965–1966), Homeboys In Outer Space (UPN, 1996–1997) and The Brady Bunch
Variety Hour (1977) in the list of failed TV shows of our time, I’m doing my
best to look at the bright side. Sure, there was plenty they stuffed up, as
we’ve been grousing about on the message boards ad nauseam. But they uncovered
some real talent, despite themselves. Buried Treasure I’m a part of that initial generation of OTLers
who hoped to make the cast ourselves. And being one of those fuzzy foreigners
who couldn’t see the show on FOX I had to have it recorded and mailed to me
each week. (Don’t you wish you had an internet friend like cici?
She never missed one!) I’ve felt the magic of the movies in that opening title
sequence, and enjoyed working vicariously through the lucky handful making
their flicks onscreen. But initially I watched with jealous pangs of “I could
do that too!” Then the gold got teased out in the
form of the best of the filmmakers. By episode 13, we were down to 5
self-effacing, intelligent, articulate guys, with a distinctive vision each.
Hardly any of the films they’d made were duds. And that jealousy gave way to
awe and admiration. There’d been the hi-tech brilliance and heart in all Zach’s
work, the off-the-wall inventiveness of Adam’s (particularly Worldly
Possessions & Driving Under The Influence), and the good old-fashioned
charm of Will’s (especially Unplugged). Put these flicks in any regular short
film festival and you’d really be blown away. Could I have created what they did, week after
week? Sure I could have… in my dreams. Who am I kidding? Spielberg and
Burnett have done what they said they would, and found at least one or two
of America’s Next Great Filmmakers. And given them the professional resources
they needed to shine. There is indeed a new generation coming up, to wipe the
floor with the old. There’s excitement in that sense of discovery. Off The Radar It’s a shame so few of us cared. Some subjects
just don’t lend themselves to reality television. And to judge by On The Lot’s
ratings, this was one. (Don’t you love how Adrianna kept on saying “Good
evening, America” and “America, cast your vote” when only the slimmest fraction
of America was actually watching?) As a San Francisco journalist once put it:
“Short films are like poetry. Everybody wants to write it but nobody wants to
read it.” It reminds me of an email I once saw… The Top 10 Least Popular FOX-TV Reality Shows (10) "Scariest Nervous Little Urinating
Dogs!" (9) "Downunder III: When Koalas Swarm" (8) "The World's Most Awkward Silences!" (7) "World's Wildest Bumper Car Crashes" (6) "Caught in the Act: First Graders Eating
Paste!" (5) "True Stories of the California
Department of Highway Maintenance!" (4) "When Prickly Heat Attacks!" (3) "Knock-Knock Jokes Revealed!" (2) "America's Funniest Wave-Particle
Dualities!" (1) "When Supermodels Hurl!" Look Who’s Talking See, the OTL producers were really stuck between a
rock and a hard place. One of the staples of reality TV is humiliation- pushing
people outside their comfort zone and telling them they s.u.c.k- but there was
something really icky about doing it to filmmakers. It’s not the same as doing
it to singers, dancers, performers, because filmmaking- even bad filmmaking- is
already so hard to do. I think the judges were aware of this themselves, as
someone memorably observed on another website: "I keep thinking Carrie Fisher is going to
have a meltdown on live tv. It'll be her moment to comment on a film but
instead she'll lapse into silence and then shake her head and say: ‘This show
s.u.c.k.s. What am I doing here? I'm sorry Steven. My career is in the toilet.
Who am I to judge anyone when this is the best job I can get?’ And then she
pulls a gun out and starts waving it around." Not only did Carrie and Garry seem uncomfortable
passing their judgements, the competitors looked desperately uncomfortable
getting them. Wouldn’t you? Their weeks of work would be brushed off with a
couple of comments, and all they could do was stand on that big bare stage,
nod, smile and maybe say “thank you” till their moment was mercifully over. The
only good bits were the words of the guest judges, who impressed me with their
knowledge of the craft. Yet to cut this staged dross and replace it with
shots of the filmmakers in action wouldn’t work either, since nobody wants to
see writers and editors tapping away at computers, film sets are boring, good
filmmakers don’t tend to argue, it’s all highly technical anyway, and you’ll
end up revealing the plot of the film they’re producing. They tried doing this
in the first couple of episodes: the audience tuned out in droves. The most intractable problem of all is that
filmmaking is an art, not a competitive sport. (George C. Scott refused to
accept his Oscar for "Patton" in 1970 because he thought that pitting
actors and their work against each another was demeaning.) In NASCAR or
baseball or football, you can see who is performing well, who isn't, you can
call it play by play, and it’ll be clear to all who won and who just lost. In
film? My view may differ from your view. And we'll both be right. The only thing we all agreed on was… That Hostess Has To Go (But I Wish She’d Come Over
To My Place) Adrianna seemed to have wandered in from another
show altogether. Like “The Female Wrestling Hour” or “When Supermodels Hurl”.
Every time she opened her mouth, I thought of the line: “Honey, I’d love to
scr*w your brains out, but I see someone already beat me to it.” I think she
probably hit her nadir in Episode 4: that excruciatingly drawn out and
repetitive elimination episode, in which she looked not just incompetent with
her verbal and physical stumbles, but pizzed off- as if she'd only come for the
dress rehearsal and they told her "Surprise! This is going to air." Unlike the filmmakers, however, she didn’t
improve. What little audience there is for a show like this are hardcore film
geeks- and while we may be socially challenged we’re not dumb- so it takes more
to hold our interest than eye candy. We needed a host who showed some sort of
rapport with the artists, some knowledge of film. As it was, she was like that
big, expensive set: terrific to look at, but completely incompatible with the
contestants and irrelevant to their films. Perhaps she might have worked as a
muppet, walking round and moving her lips while someone smarter like Carrie
Fisher did the voice. Still, it was fun to watch her little
dresses shrinking. As one OTL board-rat quipped: "Given the progress of
Adrianna's wardrobe over the weeks, why don't they just cut to the chase and
bring her out in a bikini with a pole?" Wouldn’t Garry have some quips to
make about that? Or perhaps a heart attack. The Defeats Are Also Battles I guess I bytch because I care, because I’m one of
those OTL tragics who’s stayed with it right to the bitter end. I feel like
Zach when he got the boot: there’s disappointment but no regrets. I even feel
qualified to give a few predictions. You’ll see Adrianna Costa find her niche
in health & beauty infomercials. (“Hey, America- your favourite skin cream
is here!”)… Will & Adam making movies… and Zach directing a
lines-around-the-block blockbuster, if not with Dreamworks then with somebody
else. (Look for something entitled “Paradise Redrawn”.)… And you’ll even see a
few of us from this website here and there. We’re all veterans of this train
wreck one way or another. In the end, it’s all networking, lessons in
filmmaking, grist to the mill. So don’t let anyone convince you that the fact
the show got canned made it a total waste of time. As Oliver Stone once said of
his failures, quoting General Pancho Villa: “The defeats are also battles.” At
least we didn’t have to pay for it! Live and learn. Delete
michkeemae
visit blog VideoWilliams, Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog Thanks for that, Donna!
Delete
DawnAkemi
visit blog This is a very nicely written, positive take on the show,
Dave. Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog That's so sweet of you to say, Dawn. Delete
DLCook
visit
blog You are a fantastic writer. This is the kind of support
that always should have been there for these filmmakers. As I had said on other
occassions, these filmmakers could have been any one of you. There is so much
truth in your observations of the show and what you learned about yourself.
Nothing is ever a waste of time when one can learn from the experience and have
empathy and admiration for those who remind us of ourselves. You have moved a
little farther down your spiritual path in a more enlightened direction, my
friend. Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog Wow, Diane, that's praise indeed! I see
your occupation is "Certified Spiritual Counselor" so you know
whereof you speak... Delete
stud88
visit
blog Dear videowilliams: Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog Nice to see you here, Julian! Delete cici visit
blog Great post, Dave! Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog I owe every frame of the show I've viewed to you, cheech.
Delete cici visit
blog Did Dave just say I have a big ass?? Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog And biceps to match!! Delete michkeemae
visit blog
Nw see.This is the kind of smart
blogging repartee I've been missing lately. Delete
cici visit blog Hi, Donna May! Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Donna, thanks for your wonderful comments on my films and
profile pics. I had a look at yours as well... nice cherry pie!
Delete gamblerman
visit blog
Wow....a blogger who can write. But I
don't agree with you about your TV comments. My screen-writing teacher John
Truby who wrote for 21 Jump Street says the best opportunities are on TV not
film.
Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Hi gamblerman! Delete gamblerman
visit blog
Not only are movies getting dumber and
dumber. People are watching them less and less. TV RULES. It's also morphing
and fragmenting like crazy....fusing with digital worlds more and more....the
customized FLUX BOX is coming: a digital screen where all images are consumed
period set to your private preferences...
Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Hmmm... I'm not sure if the movie theater is really
disappearing as fast as you claim there, gamblerman. It was feared that might
happen when television came in, but it didn't. Then again with the advent of
the video recorder, but it didn't. Delete gamblerman
visit blog
Well, yes.
Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
I think D.W. Griffith and Eisenstein would be right into
digital media- the same way that Beethoven got right into digital music in
"Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure" (sorry to use such a lowbrow
analogy). Creative minds love new technology. Between 1908 and 1913, Griffith
produced no less than 450 short films! Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Oh, by the way, I just checked grouchoX's blog, and while
the man himself is sadly deactivated, his words remain there, fire and
brimstone and all! Delete gamblerman
visit blog
Yeah, interactivity. How do you measure
and monetize it? Sorry, I hate bringing that up. But somehow Vloggers are now
taking off like Amanda Congdon who was fired from rocketboom.
Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Michael, I think you and I and everyone using the web to
try and get our film work, vlogs or whatever out there finds we're wrestling with
the question of how to make the effort pay. Advertising- even if you're willing
to accept it- cannot cover the costs alone. The first vlogger to crack that nut
will be onto a winner.
Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog
(cont'd)
Delete
gamblerman
visit blog
You worked with Kubrick? Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog
No no, Douglas Trumbull worked with
Kubrick. Those last three paras were quoting him! I'm afraid I'm about a
generation too young.
Delete
gamblerman
visit blog
I'm a writer, not just a film maker....poetry, short
stories, novels, kids books, and essays.... Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Maybe you can send me your next comment psychically... Delete gamblerman
visit blog
Can't mate...I'm watching Play Misty
for Me. An old Clint Eastwood horror flick.... Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Ah... That must be why I suddenly feel an irrational fear
of women... am getting flashes from that classic stalker flick... Delete gamblerman
visit blog
It's a nickle and dime Fatal
Attraction....crappy acting, silly dialogue. Clint's first try at directing. He
has improved considerably. Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Yeah, Clint's love of that area really comes through. You
can see why he later decided to become mayor of Carmel. Delete gamblerman
visit blog
Basic instinct is good. But I believe
the car chase was here in Marin where I live.
Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Ah, the BI chase was filmed up in Marin! I'll remember
that.
Delete
gamblerman
visit blog
Every movie is unique. A crap shoot.....Coppola said it's
jumping into the abyss....I agree. Delete JessicaMarie
visit blog
Nice blog, Wallaby. Delete
gamblerman
visit blog
Are you talking to Williams or me? Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog
She was talking to me, gamblerman. Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Oh, and regarding Michael's comment "I'm still
learning," I'm reminded of a line used by George Lucas: Delete gamblerman
visit blog
I see....hum, what to blog about
today....Man who Fell to earth, Quest for fire...drugstore cowboy....global
insanity...I'll come up with something. Delete
Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Season 2 with the actors? Huh! Almost sounds plausible...
In fact, that might actually work better... Delete
gamblerman
visit blog
Go talk to him... Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Will do. Delete
gamblerman
visit blog
When you see my stuff. Write me a private letter. I sent
you some links... Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Seeya, gamblerman! Delete
robk visit blog As usual, I'm late to the party. Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog
Nah, the party doesn't start till you arrive,
Rob. So by definition, you can't be late! DawnAkemi
visit blog
My goodness... such popularity! Dave... now you are the
host with the most! Delete
DawnAkemi
visit blog
Mmmm... 50th comment... mmmMMmmm! Delete Edit videowilliams
visit blog
You're a trooper to have read 'em this
far, Dawn! Since thanks to gamblerman, it's been a highly intellectual trip. So
would you like to go for a record? Currently, the marks to beat are: |